Maids of Honour – A Slice of British History

“Qu’ils Mangent de la Brioche!” or perhaps, “Let them eat their tea cakes!”, as Anne Boleyn actually mouthed before she was given ‘Le Chop’.  The “eating brioche’ part was actually said by someone else and mistakenly attributed to Anne Boleyn.   You read it here first, through lots of dubious research, I have uncovered a famous quote lost to history just until now*.

As fascinatingly brutal as that era was, we can be grateful that Henry VIII’s and Anne Boleyn’s brief pairing gave birth to this delicious tea cake called a ‘Maid of Honour’.  The best place, according to marketing hype, to eat this is at Newens at Kew Gardens in Richmond, London.

According to folklore, Henry VIII first met Anne Boleyn when she was a Maid of Honour.  This historical event took place at his Richmond Palace, and he fell in love with her eating this dainty little pastry.  Love never tasted so sweet, and if this story has a romantic ring of regality to it, there is also a dark story attached, if you believe the myth (As printed on Newen’s website).  However, it would not be surprising if this story was true, considering Henry VIII’s reputation.

Now Henry VIII’s key achievements were plenty, not excluding breaking away from the Catholic Church, beheading 2 of his wives, of which one had a younger sister who was his mistress prior and executing tens of thousands of people (72,000+ according to a less than trustable internet source*).   His daughter, Queen Mary 1, is credited with burning around 300 Protestants to their deaths and thus, earning the nickname, ‘Bloody Mary’, to whom bar-goers and bartenders around the world pay homage to with a shake of the jigger*.   Back to the dark story……

Fiesta de Moros y Cristianos

Yonks ago in the middle ages, when the Romans ran amok in England building bath-houses, glorifying Gladiators and murdering masses of people under the banner of ‘The Crusades’, Spain was itself undergoing a transformation of kinds.  At the bottom end of Spain lies the Mediterranean sea, and just across the pond, Morocco.  It was then occupied by the so-called Moors, a misnomer for a mixture of peoples from Berbers to Iberian Muslims to Arabs.

Down Brick Lane – Memories of London

When people think of London, they think London Eye, Big Ben and all your other normal touristy joints.  When I think of London, I think of Whitechapel, amongst one of the dodgiest areas in London (Thats what people tell me!) that has played host to the most famous Whitechapeler of all, Jack the Ripper.

Perhaps this luminary cemented Whitechapel’s place as a ‘special’ part of town, but really, it is a diverse, multi-ethnic area of London where you have congregations of immigrants from all over the world.  Yes, the streets are dangerous at night (Drunkards, drug addicts and pushers), but you could say that of any other street in the UK.  Well, we lived in front of Sainsbury, right next to the IdeaStore and along the stretch of the famous Whitechapel ethnic day market across Royal London Hospital. Therefore,  you could say it was in the safer part of WC that we went about our daily lives.

Besides having been the CENTRE of Britain’s H1N1 epidemic, this is also the home to the Bell Foundry, where Big Ben came from.  These historical streets have seen everything from serial killers to mob hits and more recently, Chinese people touting pirated DVDs.

Brick Lane happens to be just down the road (20 mins walk) from Aldgate Station and is home to the famous Brick Lane market and the interesting shops that throng the area.  I’d avoid the ‘curry mile’ of Indian restaurants serving up lip-smacking portions of ‘Chicken Diarrhea’, and head straight for them Beigels.

Favourite Food Joints in Bangkok

Scenario:

You have 2 days and 1 night in Bangkok, armed only with an iPhone and you need to eat and document some food.  What do you do?  What do you do?  Well, this is just a very small list of the places I frequent to satisfy desires and cravings.   Whether you can find these places or not…….its another question and up to your abilities to navigate your way around.  Here are some recommended eating places for those on a tight schedule:

Day 1 – Lunch

Songkran 2010 – Huahin

Time sure passes fast as just 1 year ago, we were celebrating Songkran in Wimbledon, London, feasting on delicacies cooked to the ‘Thai taste’ on the temple grounds.

This year, amidst the protests and riots that besieged Bangkok’s commercial nerve-centre, I began what could well be my last holiday in a long time.  Well, not so long, as Songkran 2011 will see me back here.

Its not a coincidence that Songkran and Easter follow each other closely, as both events are/were determined through astrological observations. Songkran is now celebrated within fixed dates, where the whole country simultaneously contributes to the coffers of Scottish distillers.

Imagine my shock when Polish colleagues in the UK told me of the water-splashing tradition during Easter in their country.  What are the chances that 2 different races, continents apart, practicing different religions would have the same practices?

Perhaps we are connected even more deeply then we think, and this short break was a great time to undo the hardships of the past 2 years on the road, relax, chill, drink copious amounts of alcohol, stuff my face with food and just do absolutely NOTHING.

This year, we drove up to Huahin, currently at the top of my ‘Places to retire to before 40′ list, a timely reminder of why one should take a chill pill now and again.

Offally Good – St John Restaurant, London

Just this afternoon, on my way to a Nasi Padang lunch at Keong Saik road in Singapore’s Chinatown, who should I come across but Fergus Henderson and Trevor Gulliver, along with a friend, M, sitting at the corner road kopitiam and having tiger beer.  Like a star struck groupie, I shook his hands in awe, for eating at St John was one of the best meals I’ve ever had.  This inspired me to drag my lazy ass and finally do a new blog post on this meal.

A few continents, delayed flights and man on train tracks delayed this long awaited meal at St John for a few years.  Any restaurant that has the balls (pun intended) to serve the spare parts of any animal drives me wild.  Booked a few weeks in advance, finally, we had a chance to see if its been a meal worth waiting this long for.

Restaurant La Frairie – Belgium

La Frairie is the name for a medieval tradition from the Wallon Region of Belgium where family and friends gather around a huge table and have a feast.   An apt name for this restaurant in Perwez, about 30 minutes outside of Brussels, as this is where great people make great food.

La Patisserie des Reves – Philippe Conticini

Lots of foodies were probably awaiting the opening of Philippe Conticini’s shop…..again….it is very start and stop with him, but it is so very difficult to survive in Paris when you are competing with the likes of Pierre Herme and Sadaharu Aoki.

Its on Rue de Bac, just a short walk down from Bon Marche, which carries lots of awesome foodie things and well worth a shop.  If you are looking for DelicaBar at the Bon Marche, its not there anymore and has become an Italian restaurant.  

From the outside, its really slick and the windows display all the limited offerings within.

Its got cool interiors and props for displaying the pastries, but the question you might be dying to ask is….how does it taste???

Pierre Herme – Desire et Ispahan

Ispahan, probably the most copied cake in the world for the past few years and perhaps destined to go down in history as another ‘Gateau St Honore’, or “Opera” or “Black Forest Cake”.  That is, a ‘classic’ cake that everyone has their own version of.

Ask anyone which is their favourite PH cake and the answer will be Ispahan.  Marketing hype/fad or true genius?  In case you are wondering about my tone, I want to clarify that PH is probably the guy who inspired me the most and through tasting and learning everything he does, he has taught so much.  It is a disappointment of mine that I will probably never get a chance to work for him.  

Enough crap talk, on to the cakes, which were eaten in a train station on a circular bench with a cardboard tearout ‘spoon’.  Oh….how I suffer for my art!  If you were the old guy next to me with the dog, I apologise for whipping out my tripod and driving Rover a bit bonkers with the cakes.  

Desire

Components:

1. Wild Strawberry Decoration
2. Lemon Cream
3. Banana and Wild Strawberry Compote
4. Biscuit Joconde
5. Pate Sablee

The wild strawberries were not really in season, so I have no idea where he got them from, but they did not pack much of a taste.  However, the Banana and strawberry compote was surprisingly nice.  Little chunks of banana that still had a bit of texture did not overpower the wild strawberry, which had lots of flavour.  They worked in harmony, one after another.  Really good!

The lemon cream was nice a light, stabilized with just the perfect amount of gelatin.  This cake had been travelling all day and other than being knocked around, it held up perfectly.  This was a really good cake that featured an unsuspecting combo of Banana and Wild Strawberry.  One of the most common, plain Jane ingredients paired with one of the most luxurious.  Incredible!

Ispahan

1. Macaron Shell
2. Raspberry and Lychee pieces
3. Rose and White Chocolate Cream

The rose flavour was subtle and balanced, unlike the horrible copies that taste like a bottle of rose extract.  The lychee pieces inside were tasteless orbs, perhaps frozen IQF lychees?  Canned lychees like those we ate in Chinese restaurants growing up would have given more flavour.

The raspberries were tasteless too.  This is an example of how commercialism trumps reason.  Due to its popularity, customers now demand that Ispahan be sold 365 days a year when the fruits are in season only for 1/4 of it.  But hey, if that brings in the money and keeps the tourists coming, it might be justifiable in my book.  Not in everyone’s book of course, but if one thinks about flavour perception on a normal human tongue/brain, taste is secondary to many other things.  

Of course this does not apply to nit-picking bastards like us who like to taste and taste and pass comments that are borne out of jealousy and envy!  Hands up how many of you pastry chefs reading this wished you had come up with Ispahan!  I can honestly say, without batting both eyelids at the same time, “Not Me!”

Money talks and bullshit walks.  What will PH tell his adoring fans who travel halfway around the world only to find Ispahan off the menu?  Those with artisan souls can flame me for all they want, but PH is a fine example of art meets commercialism.  

Conclusion

Were the cakes world class?  Of course, and I would love to try them again when all these fruits are in season.  PH probably gets a ‘get out of jail free’ card because he is still doing some of the best cakes in the world, right up there with Hidemi Sugino.

Pierre Herme – Viennoiseries

Note this road, for not only is Pierre Herme there, but Christian Constant, Jean Charles Rochoux and Sadaharu Aoki as well.   Such is the concentration of awesomeness here that every visit to Paris brings me to this area at least twice.

Glistening in the cases are his signature cakes, macarons and chocolates, but much overlooked are his other confections.  Cue his Viennoiseries, which were relegated to the bottom-est, farthest left shelf, destined to be ignored by the masses wowed by the fancy patisserie.